Adam le Fondre winning Man of the Match instead of Dan Burn? There's a conspiracy theory for that.
Of course there bally well is - there's a conspiracy theory for absolutely anything you could care to mention. Dan Burn's sudden upturn in form? That's due the extra sprouts in his diet, of course. How else could he have cleared that 40-yard strike from his goal line but with fart power?
And what happened to that long-awaited statue of Dave Whelan? Well... because it was made out of Cadbury's Dairy Milk, a group of passing chocoholics kidnapped it from outside the West Stand.
Send me tinfoil to make a new hat and I'll reveal even more next week... *hic*
Timecodes
0:00 Elvis ate my neighbours! And poetic intros.
1:00 Nazi space planes! And Burton review with Si's Off The Terrace report.
5:00 Referee in 'sunglasses at night' shock! And the Burton game was pap.
7:00 'Agnes' le Fondre bribery! And Bogdan's 6-yard box chicken.
12:00 The Big Four control 100% of the world's orange harvest! And deferred expectations.
15:00 Barry wears flowery boxer shorts! And Si's Leeds Off The Terrace thingy.
19:30 Yanic Wildschut secretly prefers emus! And Statman's Leeds stat pack.
24:00 Three-eyed swans in the River Dougie! And Latics have never been overrun.
27:40 Iodine in the water supply! And crocked Gilbey in for Power.
28:30 Aliens sacked Owen Coyle! And Brighton preview.
32:30 Seagull waste is an aphrodisiac! And Brighton predictions.
35:00 Feral cats siphoning my electricity! And walking football shoutout.
Fartwatch 20:00
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