Progress With Unity Podcast #165: Doncaster and Burton reviews, Southend preview

Three more to go. 270 minutes plus however many minutes of injury time those blasted officials dig from the deepest recesses of their sofas' gargantuan butt creases.

Three more afternoons to bemoan the death of the traditional 3pm kickoff. Three more days spent jammed into pathetically tiny train carriages bound for Victorian platforms with crumbling architecture.

Three more times to breathe deeply and watch an inflatable sphere roll around reclaimed sand for an hour and a half. Three more football matches for the PWU team to become very nervous about.

...Unless there are also playoff matches, that is. But such words are tantamount to blasphemy... let's finish this job now!

Progress With Unity Podcast #164: Coventry review, Doncaster and Burton previews

Oh, did someone at the back ask for a bunch of cheesy stats stolen from BBC Sport?

It may surprise you that Wigan haven’t scored more than a single goal in any game at the DW since February. Prior to the 1-1 draw with Peterborough on 5 March, they had only failed to score three in a single game this calendar year – a scoreless draw against Oldham on that new shag pile.

Since that fateful afternoon, the ‘Real Latics’ have beaten Gillingham, Peterborough, Chesterfield, Swindon and Walsall… and of course, drawn with then-leaders Burton Albion. I’d suggest they’ll be safe from relegation now, even if Millwall (A) and Coventry (H) await in the last two games of the season.

But getting back to the ‘Plastic Latics’ and their recent home ‘goal drought’, such as it is… well, I’ll let those boisterous PWU panellists be the judge of that. Hmm, I wonder if Statman will be annoyed that I’m trying to emulate him?

Well, Gaz, mimicry is the saltiest form of battery… or something like that.